Could It Be True?

Wasted time

We're putting our pennies in a jar

Saving for that ship

We're waiting for our ship to come

It's been at sea for so long now

Not sure I believe it was ever meant to port

So then I say

All I need is you

Tired of all this play

And it's true and it's true

I need you, only you

We've walked too long

Convinced it's just over the next peak

But some journeys never end

Could it be true?

Could we be lost?

Could we be not as smart as they say we are?

That's clear to me

So I say

All I need is you

Tired of all this play

And it's true and it's true

I need you, only you

This argument has been in vain

Thought I knew best

But I've always been wrong

It's like arguing for something

That you know is wrong

Just because of my pride

So then I say

What I should have said long before

Please don't walk out that door

All I need is you

And I still get that feeling

When you're near me

Tired of all this play without you

And wasting all this time

And it's true and it's true

I need you, only you

by: Drew

written: October 13, 2008

(#128)

I See

Peel back the gray cover

You can't really see

And for all my trying

Since I've been under the vail

Once again I seem to fail

There is still only one that I want

And it's not that bad I guess

Running is never the key

It's more slowing down enough to see

And I see, you see, when I seee-m to just sit and be

It's such a sad thing to be me right now

Fell in love with a little girl quite a while ago

Opened my heart, but have yet to close it to her till now

Loved her for what seems so long

Sad and weary, cause sure she won't want me by the end of this song

There is still only one that I want

But it's hard to see past that

Running is never the key

But sometimes you need to run to settle me

And I see, you see, when I seee-m to just sit and be

The heart can be deceiving

Can't rely on it, but its significant of life

Maybe I'll just set it aside for a time

Cause it's only lead me astay

Since I've been listening to it as it runs away

Hold it down

No time for a frown

Or tell yourself whatever it is

That makes you feel good for now

There is still only one that I want

And it's not that bad I guess

Running is never the key

It's more slowing down enough to see

And I see, you see, when I seee-m to just sit and be

Hold it down

Life's more than you think it is

by: Andrew

written: September 27th, 2008

(#127)

Vision is Only One of Five

An unsensed fear

That I'll have none left for me

I will live that fear

You say believe in what I can't see

But I do see

Where is this disconnect?
Why do we feel disoriented, out of context?
You say you probably can't make it out
So what happened along the way?
How'd we lose touch?

Vision is only half with these eyes

The rest is with these pages

Given to aid these eyes

Vision is only one of five

But it is one that burns memories
In our mind

Fears are not realized
If you fear something that never comes
Despite this, I never realized
All these subtractions, I add the sums
Clear eyes and vision comes

Doldrums on a wake in my mind
You ask, do I ever feel like a misfit?
Well life does drone on and on
Do you feel out-of-sorts?
Do you ever feel like a ragamuffin?

Vision is only half with these eyes

The rest is with these pages

Given to aid these eyes

Vision is only one of five

But it is one that burns memories
In our mind

Sun seems so bright
But am I just looking outside?
Can I only half as bright?
Am I meant to be on the other side
I just need some movement, to the outside

It's so much greener
So much brighter than here
Are you gonna let it glow?
There's plenty of space to move
Don't let memories weigh you down

Vision is only half with these eyes

The rest is with these pages

Given to aid these eyes

Vision is only one of five

But it is one that burns memories
In our mind

It's half with these eyes

But also with these pages

Vision is only one of five

But memories burn in my mind
They burn less with more time


by: Drew
written: April 24, 2008
(#126)

Blood Returns

It seems so long and belated 
Same thing, again and again 
Is it that difficult to find 
Is there an answer 
 
It makes me question myself 
Am I doing something wrong 
Do I come off too strong 
Am I living in the past 
 
I wait while the blood returns 
To my body 
Living in the past 
Will do that to you 
Slap my face, blood returns 
I'll just sit while blood returns 
 
It seems to me, hard to see 
If I'm waiting for my ship to come in 
Then maybe I'll miss it 
Cause my lantern's not lit 
 
It's like chasing a breeze 
Can't grasp, can't feel 
With all we meant to each other 
There's not a call, not a word 
 
I wait while the blood returns 
To my body 
Living in the past 
Will do that to you 
Slap my face, blood returns 
I'll just sit while blood returns 
 
It seems like so long ago 
My shoes seem brand new 
Cause I haven't run through your mind 
In quite some time 
 
It doesn't make sense 
Why am I so off kilter lately 
I should show some teeth 
Close my eyes, reset my mind 
 
I wait while the blood returns 
To my body 
Living in the past 
Will do that to you 
Slap my face, blood returns 
I'll just sit while blood returns 
 
It's not that there's no time 

It's just that I'll only ask one more time 

I can't bear to drag it out 

As if there was a reason 

 

It's all laid out on a timeline 

There's ups and down 

But two years now, nothing's moved 

How is that 

 

I wait while the blood returns 
To my body 
Living in the past 
Will do that to you 
Slap my face, blood returns 
I'll just sit while blood returns 

 

It doesn't make sense 

That you can't offer anything better 

Than what you said 

We'll never look at each other the same 

 

It doesn't have to be all bad 

Let your face glow, smile awhile 

Just cause I won't see you much 

That's just how it has to be 

 

I wait while the blood returns 
To my body 
Living in the past 
Will do that to you 
Slap my face, blood returns 
I'll just sit while blood returns 

 

It has to resolve somehow 

What a mess we've made 

Things will turn up 

Just smile 

 

You don't have to hear or see me 

To know that we're okay 

I just can't see you 

Till I deal with the past 

 

I slap my face 

The blood returns 

Leave past with past 

I'll be around, dear 

by: Drew

written: April 2, 2008

(#125)

Wrestle

We've had few conversations lately 

When we have, they've been short 

You're still lovely as ever 

But now it seems it's come to never 

 

I'd never intentionally hurt you 

But now we're walking backwards 

I don't know if I walk away 

Or if I just wait 

 

Now all of this to say 

That I'll wait as long as it will take 

Even if I'm with someone, minus a ring 

Cause anything worth waiting for 

Might bend me till I break 

 

So 

Please be gentle 

I can't make you feel the same 

I would never play that game 

With a heart so tender 

So I'll be your friend all the same 

 

Cause patients are for doctors 

But patience is for me 

So please be gentle 

 

Any pain there could be 

Is worth it to me 

I've wrestled the Lord now 

And somehow the answer's the same 

Let me know, if you see what I see 

 

So 

Please be gentle 

I can't make you feel the same 

I would never play that game 

With a heart so tender 

So I'll be your friend all the same 

 

Cause patients are for doctors 

But patience is for me 

So please be gentle 

 

You say that you are shy 

But what I want you to know 

Is how beautiful you are 

Not just outside 

Beyond your face that seems to glow 

If there's any pain, there might be 

It's worth it to me 

I've wrestled the Lord now 

And somehow the answer's the same 

Let me know, if you see what I see 

So 

Please be gentle 

I can't make you feel the same 

I need to wait 

Cause it's better than if I'd never see  

If that person is you.

by: Drew

written: March 30, 2008

(#124)

Farewell

This is just sad

I can't hear you anymore

Why do your words seem muffled

Barely make out the words

How does this happen

Just become somewhat numb

To this, seems so dumb

When did you fall asleep

When did you fall away

I can see it

In your eyes these days

You need to wake up

You need to wake up

Cause I can't hear a word

I think they call these doldrums

It's just a wake in life

Wish it'd just pass

I'm slightly short tempered

I've just come to feel so numb

I'm tired, it's so dumb

Thank you for what you said

It's all I needed to hear

Fall away

From me now

Fall away

Can you hear me now

You can't stay here

Cause it's not good for you

You can't stay where you've been

Cause you'll only fall again

Words are faded

Become a constant hum and I'm numb

To this, it seems so dumb

Thank you for what you said

It's all I needed to hear

Fall away

From me now

Fall away

Can you hear me now

What'd you expect

Can't just pick back up

From where we were

Just as soon I'd say goodbye

So I say farewell to you

by: Drew

written: March 29, 2008

(#123)

Queazy (Wanna Find Out)

Almost seems useless
But it doesn't hurt you to know
It's not a surprise
I could tell you with my eyes

But of course
Something has to change
I'm willing to wait for you
But you'd have to want me to

Do you think it'd be a big deal
If I just hang on to you
What if we just skipped this town
Can't you just forget yourself
Just one night, might not be so bad

Do you know
Do I know
Do we know
I don't know
But I sure wanna find out

When someone took your heart
Why's it so hard to take it back
I don't even want it now
I'll get by without it somehow

Everything can't fit, like you said
And then have nothing be
What's the point in that
Can we just fall flat

Do you really think it's about feeling
Well if that's true
Then I'm feelin queazy
Can't you just forget about it
Just one night, might not be so bad

Do you know
Do I know
Do we know
I don't know
But I sure wanna find out

Hey tomorrow
How the hell are you
Wished you'd come earlier
Just so I'd stopped seein her

How can you be sure
I know what's true
And I love you
And you love me too
Does there have to be anything else?


by: Drew
written: March 18, 2008
(#122)

Not To My Heart

I don't wanna see you
How did we come full circle
Just to break something
Something that'd become good

Why didn't you think before
Lord knows I did
And I've done that
Too much of late

Am I just another one
Can't believe that'd be
So you just had your fun
And now we're done

Let the moons go down
Let day break over
And over again
Will we be close again
Not to my heart

I don't wanna hear it again
Grow up, get out, I'm done
Not to my face
I'm so tired of being abused
Not to my face

I don't even know you
Thought I wanted you
But how could that be
If this is what you are

Thought we'd grown up now
You can't use someone
Like we used to
Can't blame it on youth

I try to get angry
But I don't
Do feel the regret
No, not quite yet

Let the moons go down
Let day break over
And over again
Will we be close again
Not to my heart

I don't wanna hear it again
Grow up, get out, I'm done
Not to my face
I'm so tired of being abused
Not to my face

I should never talk to you
I try this out for a while
But I know it won't stick
Be careful with me

I just can't see you for a while
That's only because of this
Because I still want you
I'm just waiting till it fades
Fades away


by:Drew
written: March 18th, 2008
(#121)

Without Reservation

It took me a while to process this 

I've kept it to my self for some time 

And now that I'm walking more stable 

I guess I'm far more able 

To say it aloud 

I ask this of you 

But not aloud 

Just in a rhetorical verbal process  

So is it just that you're scared? 
Don't just say that you love me 
It's okay to be afraid 
I just can't see you 
Till I'm convinced otherwise 

Cause right now I'm too far along 
I see you with our boy 
Walking toward me 
Can't you see 

But that fades 
When I realize 
That you don't love me 
Cause you did what you did 

But now I see 

That I was way too 

Focused on the the me 

In the conversation 

Did I just lose a friend 

I asked myself 
In all this that we've done 
Guess we have to decide 
If we'll let each other back inside 

Some mornings 
You gotta drag yourself 
Outta bed, mind pulls your body along 
Convince yourself the day's not that long 

But that's not living 

That's just existing 

The melodies of life 

Faintly work their way back in 

And I'm smiling now 

I am happy for you 

Happy like a brother should be 

And after all this 

I'm not all composed to describe 

But I am happy 

Sister, I truly love you 

Like a brother should 

Wish you all the best 

I smile, and the melody of the day 

Rings in your happiness 

And after all this 

I reminisce 

Life's not all about bliss 

But happiness comes in the waiting 

And the listening, and in the patience 

I haven't arrived 

I haven't been deprived 

And I haven't seen nearly all my life 

Now I am smiling 

Happy for you, without reservation 

by: Drew 

written: February 14th, 2009 (but processed for a year) 

(#129) 

All the best sister:). I'm so happy for you. I can't wait to meet him.

Crayons

You always say you wish you could do it different

You feel you always get the raw end

You don't get back what you give

Seems to me

There's too many "you"s in your thinking

We never claimed living was easy

Sometimes it helps to take it back to crayons and colored pencils
Color your world like a child
We could all do with
A little childish nature
To make this grown up world not so bad

Please listen as I say,
"You have to face your mistakes
Do whatever it takes to change.
There is no would be, should be, or could have been
There's just what is and what will be
And it's not always what we see initially."

You start shaking and you're laughing out loud
Choose your words carefully
Cause like a knife
Once you cut you can't take it back
You're not a boy anymore
There will be consequences

You've been working too hard and too long
You need to breathe
You need to play

Please listen as I say,
"You have to face your mistakes
Do whatever it takes to change.
There is no would be, should be, or could have been
There's just what is and what will be
And it's not always what we see initially."

I can see your face now
I can't help but feel different than you
I've been talking to myself lately
Now I just have to turn it off
And walk...

Just listen one last time.
Your mistakes are done
Do whatever it takes to get past them
There is no would be, should be, or could have been
There's just what is and what will be
So please wake up and see


by: DReW
written: February 9, 2008
(#119)

Your Love Is Red

Climb your way

Up the clouds

Maybe you can reach heaven

Sun doesn't seem that far away

Maybe it just wants to play

All I ever wanted was love
But I saw in Black & White
Didn't see that love has color
Your love is Red...

Diving in a pool of past

Can't get soaked

Lest I drown in what I was

Drifting out to sea

How did this pool reach the ocean?

Knew I shouldn't have let it cover me

Now I'm out to sea

Drifting out to sea
Washed up on loveless shore
Heavy heart made you sink

All I ever wanted was love
But I saw in Black & White
Didn't see that love has color
Your love is Red...

Dust clouds surround
The crash site of
A broken man that I've found
Flew too high
Couldn't see the warning signs
You were never alone
You can't build a tower
Or fly high enough
To get there alone

All I ever wanted was love
But I saw in Black & White
Didn't see that love has color
Your love is Red...

I've said, I'm not going to take this sitting down
I'm not gonna just stand and wait around
But if I'd just turned around
I'd see love waiting for me to slow & see
That your love is Red...
And I am gray
But what do I know about color
Or love or clouds or seas

All I ever wanted was love
But I saw in Black & White
Didn't see that love has color
Your love is Red...

If I'd just turned around
I'd see love waiting there for me just to see
That your love is Red...
And I am gray


by: Drew
written: February 9, 2008
(#118)

This Taste

Light fades in
Darkness fades out
Frustration sets in
And careless words go out

This taste on my lips
Can't be the best there is

Cause if it is, there is
No romance left in me

And there is, I know it

Just wish I could show it
But not to you, not by me
But it's out there somewhere
Out there in between...

Broken hearts & diamond rings

Are a world apart

But they are the things

Of songs we sing

Can't you even control it
Comes out like you can't hold it
But it bites, and cuts the one
You're talking to
And the one it's about

Like tender morsels
They go down
But when it's inside you
Your mind has mulled it over
Bitter is all you taste...

Broken hearts & diamond rings

Are a world apart

But they are the things

Of songs we sing

Yeah, maybe he needs to cool it
But it's not your job to talk it
To all your confidants
And anyone, and everyone
Besides the one you should

We're grown up now
And sometimes our biggest enemy
Is the one so hard to tame
Your tongue is loose
Can't you even control it?

Broken hearts & diamond rings

Are a world apart

But they are the things

Of songs we sing

Truth is better than romance
Stands a test of time
Smooth words turn bitter
When they fall on broken ears
All I know is that I'm tired...

These broken hearts & diamond rings

Are worlds apart

But they are the things

Of songs we sing

This taste is all reality now
Can't sense anything past it
But we have to forgive and let go now
If we don't then this taste
Will turn us outside-in

Worlds apart they may be
Yet these are things of songs we sing


by: Drew
written: February 12, 2008
(#120)

The Sound of Letting Go

So was I born blind

To reality about what it takes?

Feel like I'm always

One step behind

In so many ways

Haven't slept well

In over two weeks

You can wipe a slate clean

But not a memory

From what I've seen

Alone doesn't seem

That far away

I can't be the only one

With this look on my face

Can't seem to see the sun

Just let it go

Don't make a scene

Let's not make this more

Than it has to be

So just let it go...

This is the sound

Of letting go

Quieter than I'd think

That it would be

Just missed a link

Letting go is not so bad

Cause when your hand releases

It just means you hold on

To something else

Something worth holding on

Just let it go

Don't make a scene

Let's not make this more

Than it has to be

So just let it go...

Not much has really changed

So I don't see

What's the big deal

Just floating like a fog

We're evaporating, it's real

As the sun comes up

Your flare for excuses fades

I don't want to push the issue

Cause if you don't want it

Call what's true... true

Just let it go

Don't make a scene

Let's not make this more

Than it has to be

So just let it go...

It's not complicated

We're frustrated

But this has become

So much clearer

With morning come

by: Drew

written: January 23, 2008

(#117)

Thousand Miles Away

A pebble in streams

Flowers in fields

Rocks on mountain sides

Wind from God knows where

I could move a thousand miles away

But I'd still be right here

Where I am now

I can't escape it

Can't even fake it

It's alright

Cause past is past

It went by so fast

And you know I'm the last

That'd hold that against you

On a windy street in Chicago

There's a man

Who'd give anything

To swap cities with me

But what's the use

I could move a thousand miles away

But I'd still be right here

Where I am now

I can't escape it

Can't even fake it

It's not so much a state

But a state of mind

How can fields and streams

Seem like prison

It's only in my head

It's alright

Cause past is past

And you know I'm the last

That'd hold that against you

I could move a thousand miles away

But I'd still be right here

Where I am now

I can't escape it

Can't even fake it

A young boy

Sits alone on the beach

Staring at the waves

Wishing for some place else

He doesn't even know where

It's alright

Cause past is past

And good things don't always last

So just let's let this lie

I could move a thousand miles away

But I'd still be right here

Where I am now

I can't belate it

Cause this is how we made it

So I'll say good night

And go

by: dREW

written: January 23, 2008

(#116)

All For The Best

Haven't slept well

Two weeks now

Blank I feel

You would have said something

If you'd cared

After what I said

Least you could say

Is... something

Maybe it's all for the best

If that's true, I'd give up best

If I could just rest

Just rest...

Are we playing

Keep away from me

Feels like that

Maybe it's all

For the best

Or is that just a saying

To make us feel better

But I don't feel better

Maybe it's all for the best

If that's true, I'd give up best

If I could just rest

Just rest...

I walk alone in the garden

You should try it sometime

Solo is not so bad

Conversations are no less

Just to yourself

You'd be amazed at what you learn

When you just listen

Under moonlight

Maybe it's all for the best

If that's true, I'd give up best

If I could just rest

But I can't like this

The rest of us are watching

Thinking there's something better

Never satisfied with now and hear

My dear, just listen

I don't even want you

Under the old willow

Leaving doesn't seem so bad

I might come back

Mights turn into won'ts

Maybe it's all for the best

If that's true, I'd give up best

If I could just rest

I'd think clearly

In the morning

by: DReW

written: January 22, 2008

(#115)

Not Like This

I hate this

I never should have said a thing

Was it always about me?

Mistakes are funny that way

No matter how far away

They still are always

What was wrong

Cause I never thought it'd turn out

Not like this

Never like this

Don't wanna fake it

This memory of you

Just wanna take it

Away from here

Make it go away

I hate how this

Has turned out like this

Why I say why?

Misdirected and misunderstood

I was younger, and I should

Have slowed n understood

What was wrong

Cause I never thought it'd turn out

Not like this

Never like this

Don't wanna fake it

This memory of you

Just wanna take it

Away from here

Make it go away

Saw him today

The man who hurt you so bad

Remember you forgave him

And you asked me that question

What if daddy never forgave

And I reassured you He gave

Far more than that

Cause I never thought it'd turn out

Not like this

Never like this

Don't wanna fake it

This memory of you

Just wanna take it

Away from here

Make it go away

I've wished this so many times

Now it seems

I can only walk away

I won't see you as much as before

Sorry I made u feel that way

They say it's never too late

But it seems that way

Good night

See you around

See you later

by: dRew

written: January 20, 2008

(#113)

written for someone who used to be a dear dear friend. some things in life just have to be let go of. this friendship seems to be one of those things. i see her sometimes, but it's never really a friendship. apparently i creeped her out, and that hurts me more than anything. that's enough to bring tears to my eyes. thinking back to how much we've shared and invested, i'm just so sad about it whenever i even think about it. i try not to much anymore. maybe that's bad. it's a way of coping. well, barefoot girl, hope we can trust each other again some day...

Run Run

Speak no

Not a word from you

We've said enough

Words are not

What says so much

Sometimes nothing is more

Sometimes you need to just

Run run

Fly fly

Cry cry

It's easy

To sit back

And place the blame

Words can't say

What actions deny

Sometimes actions are more

Sometimes you need to just

Run run

Fall fall

Call call

I'm drifting

To that place

Don't need it

Words are so

Much more than

Just what we needed

Won't you just please

Drop drop down

Run run

Fun fun

Not like this

Not now

Our plans

Our dreams

Not what it seems

When I was young

When you were true

I yell yell

I run run

You know me better than this

Not like this

I'm glad

We never did that

Wouldn't trade it

Run run

Cause you need to

Run run

You're free to

Run run

by: dRew

written: January 20, 2008

(#112)

Little Boy

Little boy

Sits by the road

Dusty, dry road

Hot hot sun

Not much around

No noise to be found

But harmonica sound

But that boy knows of hurt

That boy, hurt but strong

Knows only one song

Jesus' blood, washes me

Jesus' blood, I am clean

Just breathes

In and out

On that harmonica

Hot hot sun

But that's sweet sound

To Him that's found

Little boy, arms around

But that boy knows of hurt

That boy, hurt but strong

Knows only one song

Jesus' blood, washes me

Jesus' blood, I am clean

Little boy

Cries by the road

Tears dry with dust

Hot hot sun

Doesn't cry for nothing

Cause there is something

There is one thing

He held me when I was beaten

He was beaten too

He holds me now

Though I'm sad and broken

He was too

But that boy knows of hurt

That boy, hurt but strong

Knows only one song

Jesus' blood, washes me

Jesus' blood, I'm clean

Little boy

Stands by the road

Boy is a man,

Far from that road

He has a son

Signs to his little boy

Jesus' blood, washes you

Jesus' blood, you are clean

On my road

Jesus' blood never failed me

Jesus' blood never failed me

Jesus' blood never failed me

by: dRew

written: January 20, 2008

(#111)

Midday

It's funny

Yesterday was so sunny

Now it's just soggy

Was white and fluffy

Then turned to gray

Makes you stretch

Just to get that release

From stretched muscles

Head's a little fuzzy

But enough about me

How are your skies today?

A shade of gray,

Or an amber from sun's ray?

Lazy and tired

Good day for a nap

Or even a road-trip

Without a map

I look out

That same coffee shop window

Now just drops of water

And gray behind

Late lunch

Coffee, and nothing

Really on my mind

Pithy conversation

The man and woman

In front of me

The words

Drunk, delivery room, and diva

All I think is one more "d"

Dimwhitted

Still drizzling

Still gray

A bit past midday

Today

Makes tomorrow

Something to look forward to

Still gray

Have to get up

Time to get back

by: Drew

written: January 18, 2008

(#108)

Oh GOD

oh GOD, can you hear me? did i just ask that? tired ideas not fully thought through. smoke rings rise from thoughts too thoughtfully constructed. as if there was such a thing. let LOVE leave you longing for more. make money mean less more and more. teach truth to all who try way too hard. and fix faith from above firmly in your eyes. have hope here in your heart and in what's not seen. but mostly, let LOVE leave you longing for more. cause i know what's in store, when you learn to love more and more and more. oh GOD, can you teach me? of course i know the answer. i'm tired of thinking through things that are not for me. there is such a thing. slow and steady in my heart... let LOVE leave you longing for more. make money mean less more and more. teach truth to all who try way too hard. and fix faith from above firmly in your eyes. have hope here in your heart and in what's not seen. but mostly, let LOVE leave you longing for more. cause there is much more, if you let it be. oh GOD, i can't see and i'm scared. i'm feeling in the dark for your hand. i'm not meant to do this on my own. individuality seems so lonely. whispered to me in the dark... let LOVE leave you longing for more. make money mean less more and more. teach truth to all who try way too hard. and fix faith from above firmly in your eyes. have hope here in your heart and in what's not seen. but mostly, let LOVE leave you longing for more. oh my GOD, don't let me leave without a light. a noise. a growing glow. and morning is coming. daylight breaks the black, and your shape is beside. why did i fear? why did i ask? why did i strain? light... oh GOD

by: Drew

written: January 18th, 2008

(#107)

A Question

My eyes are glazing over as the glass is hazing in front of me. It's amazing that despite the fact that I'm phasing, I can still see this thing that there's nothing else worth praising.

I don't want to feel alone again. Empty is not something that fills much of anything. Did you hear what I just said? I don't want to feel alone again. But just cause you don't want something, doesn't mean a thing.

A cause for reaction, but not a for subtraction from the equation. My world only clears when I take myself out of the equation. Did you hear me? My eyes readjust to the road that I must watch closely. Yesterday it was not all abust, but at least I can trust that tomorrow brings the sun. Fading lust, and growing trust reflect on my vision.

I don't want to feel alone again. Empty is not something that fills much at all. Did you hear what I just said? I don't want to feel this again. But just cause I don't want it, doesn't mean a thing.

My man is dead inside so I hold back what I've cried out for. I've often lied about this pride, but that only it spread so wide that I can't keep it inside.

But I don't want to feel alone again. Empty is not something that fills much of anything. Did you hear what I just said? I don't want to feel dead again. But just cause you don't want to die, doesn't mean there's good reason why.

A cause for distraction, different course of action in the equation. My world only makes sense when I take myself out of the equation. Now I'll fade to nothing so I can see something. I'll close my eyes. I'll lift my head. I'll stop talking... and I'll fade... so I can see you.

by: dRew

written: January 18, 2008

(#106)

Time

I miss you lately. Not like I need to hold your hand, just talk a bit. What ever happened to us? I know I messed up. But what's done is done and forgiven. At least you said it was. I love your mom. Hardly knew your dad. Love your brother and your sisters too. It's just this friendship doesn't seem true.

>>But everything doesn't turn out as it "should." What is should, but something that could, but only would if you could change time. So it's alright, so I say g'night, talk to you later I might.<<

Smiles are put-on. Never time for me it seems. You never really did go out of your way. Always did seem a little one-sided. Mistakes are double-sided. Guess I just have to let it go. I miss my friend, but my friend sees me different now. Never really saw me for me. I never claimed to be that man. Actually tried to break any illusion. But now I only  feel like I'm an intrusion. Was it a delusion, me thinking we could be good friends?

>>But everything doesn't turn out as it "should." What is should, but something that could, but only would if you could change time. So it's alright, so I say g'night, talk to you later I might.<<

You tried too hard to be strong. Wished you'd stopped and heard me talk. Always seemed so busy. Seemed to doubt if I knew what I said I knew. Seeming lack of trust in what I said.

>>But everything doesn't turn out as it "should." What is should, but something that could, but only would if you could change time. So it's alright, so I say g'night, talk to you later I might.<<

Time brings distance. Whether intended or not. We can't stop it, change it,  or control it. We can only try to use it while we have it. Slow yourself down. Time should be taken slowly. Don't try to solve everything & anything without takin it slowly. Anything worth everything is worth waiting for.

>>But everything doesn't turn out as it "should." What is should, but something that could, but only would if you could change time. So it's alright, so I say g'night, talk to you later I might.<<

I'm still sorry, I'm still changing, but now I'm at peace. Sweet release makes it easier. I worry about today, cause tomorrow worries enough as it is. The sun reflects through the coffee shop window. And TIME... reflects in my memory. Hope... you are well today.

by: dRew

written: January 16, 2008

(#105)

Come Inside

Oh oh, the morning after
A cool rain changes the air
What was cold is warm
Was warm, now cold

You can be so fickle
But I guess you're allowed
It's your prerogative, just not
Very attractive to me

Well, you'll find your way back
Back to warmer weather
You seem so cold now
Just need some rain clouds
You'll find your way back

Whether the weather likes it or not
It changes with changing seasons
Almost like she changes
Like for a date

Winter is formal
Summer is fun
Spring is just woke up
And Fall is when she's falling apart

Well, I'm convinced
You'll find your way back
To warmer weather
You seem to need some rain clouds
You'll find your way back

Whether the weather likes it or not
She changes with changing seasons
Almost like she changes
Like for a big day

Could just be
A matter of a degree
Could change everything
Just change your eyes

Now I'm convinced
You'll find your way back
To warmer weather
You seem to need some rain clouds
You'll find your way back

Whether the weather likes it or not
She changes with changing seasons
Almost like she changes
Cause she knows, she has to

If she doesn't
She'll be winter all the time
Can't stay out in the cold
It's lonely there

Whether your weather changes or not
We'll still love you the same
It's just warmer when you smile
So come inside for a while


by: Drew
written: January 14, 2008
(#103)

Crop Circles (On Things Above)

Are we alone now?
Seems silent out here
All but the sound of cricket and wind

Do u remember the time?
The field reminds me of
Sun's getting lower so it looks golden

Do you still fear the same?
I'm not the same as before
I don't fear the same things, I'm okay

I don't think that she'll leave me anymore
Not afraid of abandonment like before
Life of fear is more ironic than anything else

So what if there's crop circles
In my fields
Are we alone now?
Or is someone out there?
You'll just have to trust me
We're not alone now

If you think you're alone
I doesn't matter if you are
or if you're not

At that moment
You can remember before
Everything seems better then

Are you still afraid?
Then set your mind
On things above

I don't think that she'll leave me anymore
Not afraid of abandonment like before
This smile's been here a while

So what if there's crop circles
In my fields
Are we alone now?
Or is someone out there?
You'll just have to trust me
We're not alone now

Close your eyes
Say a prayer
You're not alone now

At that moment
Crop circles in your mind
Suddenly make sense like never before

Are you still afraid?
Then set your mind
On things above

We're never really alone
Never fear abandonment any more
Cause you're not by yourself

So what if there's crop circles
In my fields
Are we alone now?
Or is someone out there?
You'll just have to trust me
We're not alone now

What you ask?
Open your eyes now
Still quiet, still dark
You're not alone out here


by: Drew
written: January 14, 2008
(#102)